tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-54789732011-04-22T07:23:08.489+08:00within my peace<strong>a black hole of words; a spiral of dreams</strong>Jacknoreply@blogger.comBlogger1111100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1135591738397392252005-12-26T18:05:00.000+08:002005-12-26T18:10:50.233+08:00I have decided to slightly alter the nature of the contents of my blog. Thus, i have moved the the blog to Another Peace. Yes, i do things on a whim so sue me. Well, there might still be postings here. Damn, ain't i a bastard.Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1132747022851101552005-11-23T19:54:00.001+08:002005-11-24T22:27:08.886+08:00oh my hands, they've tried to graspthe stars alluring but alas, alike dreams, it eschewsso fleeting to the touch.random thoughts: the illusion of agebeen writing alot about life it seem looking back at the fewentries i managed to churn out for the last few months. Iwonder whether it's coz im 21 this year, 21 being society's deifinite age of adulthood. and for a blog which professed totouch on Jacknoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1132206092277407762005-11-16T13:18:00.000+08:002005-11-21T02:45:25.930+08:00random thoughts: serendipity ?ha... fate is seriously trying to tell me something man.just yesterday, i wrote about my "lost time", and intoday's newspapers was an article on identity disorder which somewhat reflected my own condition. if anyone is interested, it's page 14 of Mind Your Body that comes with The Strait Times. "like actors playing themselves", "keeping their genuine emotions at bay,Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1130614979067890532005-10-30T03:30:00.001+08:002005-11-21T02:43:42.350+08:00random thoughts: in my mind lingers the scent of a lovely countenancesmall quick glances of foolishness demure.abscond behind the drapes, take a peek oh the heart yearns for more.the lines above i wrote in a matter of minutes. and iwonder why i have not been able to write a full piece for so many months. i wonder now whether it's due tothe fact i feel like a kid again being back in school.have i Jacknoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1130178359557959782005-10-25T02:18:00.000+08:002005-10-25T02:25:59.610+08:00ok, i know re-posting my old pieces is kinda considered cheating. but at least i changed a word or two? hahafor me aloneby the panes it singsa drone that reminisces envelops me in its wingswith a heart that burrows beneath burgeoning springwhat a tragedy it must benot to hear the songs of myriad leaves and its windfor me alone in my abodebut a taper to tend the sightnaught but with melancholy Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1122277916811172722005-07-25T15:51:00.000+08:002005-07-25T15:53:06.560+08:00destiny awaits me;but i'd rather the simple joys in life.back to being a kid. that's how i would describe the transition from life during NS to life in the university.no responsibility to tasks that were entrusted to you, no responsibility to your colleagues and fellow soldiers.etccertainly, it would vary from individual to individual. froma particular point of view, it would appear that most of Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1120058082938807812005-06-29T23:03:00.000+08:002005-06-29T23:22:35.266+08:00within my peace, a black hole of wordsa spiral of dreams.an ode to days when i could just lie down by the green and dream.Well, this current incarnation of "In Peace" has lasted for two years. A cove for thoughts and poetry i call myown. And no, there will never be corny life stories or over-the-top attention seeking tales on this blog. A contrast to my real-life personality maybe, but this Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1119116816788089352005-06-19T01:37:00.000+08:002005-06-19T01:48:51.183+08:00a rare confession of untainted feelings... there is no subtleties amongst these wordsno hidden meanings, only what i feel.sometimes, it's easier to simply write whatyou mean instead of concealing them in aspiral of words. for you,i have a flower here lying in my heartthat is yours to keepbut would you ever accept it?well, guess it's obvious to everyone.Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1116494741645554962005-05-19T17:23:00.000+08:002005-05-19T17:26:45.606+08:00breaking the downward spiral... i hopemy house and timeoh what else have i forfeited this day but for time and its essence.alas myself i find malicewith knives concealed behind the foldsand melancholy to be its accomplice.for light enters and is entrapped'tween the sordid twiningof ornate ponderings and regret. silence toils under coverand to what does it beget?but wretched knells of hours Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1115914704652287762005-05-12T22:49:00.000+08:002005-05-13T00:39:55.513+08:00random thoughts: the downward spiralI have not written a proper piece since Jan andI'm afraid i might not do so for a long time more.My recent short compositions appear to me detached and apathetic, unable to capture the innumerable emotions in their essence. Shallow and lacking direction; how else can i describe them other than them being spiritless and banal. Hah! i feel foolish even talking Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1114972193852866602005-05-02T02:26:00.000+08:002005-07-04T15:16:47.940+08:00random thoughts: beautiful uncertainty,is there truth in it?love's but a willowy shipgliding along the loneliest nights.who shall be the lantern on the shivery sandsto guide this ship through treacherous wavesand what if hope and i should falterto leave us oceans apart.but alas more woeful it is to find the ship still docked in bay.for out at sea though oceans apartleast we havewith love, with Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1114098226789365872005-04-21T23:43:00.000+08:002005-04-21T23:57:25.723+08:00to reiterate my previous post:Philosophical and pompous bullshit will be the conclusion of most people who read this. And maybe along with a diagnosis of myself having serious issues on coping with life. ermm... no commentsbound to destiny;chained and haunted by it.When i was younger, i was often reckoned to be a future over-achiever. Never the prodigy or genius, but deemed to possess an uncanny Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1113842259287989432005-04-18T23:55:00.000+08:002005-07-02T02:36:47.923+08:00ignorance is bliss. be thankful.the malady: an allergy to happinessthe diagnosis: i have an aversion to happiness and i realize it is holding me back.it's like being a character from the movieswhere after being devoid of joy or happiness for so long, they either reject these feelingsor are at a loss on how to handle them. all these plastic smiles that i don, now i dont even know which ones areJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1113382965494882752005-04-13T17:01:00.000+08:002005-04-13T17:04:49.796+08:00random thoughts: as dust lie asleep on my heartas the dust settled to the groundit is cleansed by a swish of moist.alas it seems ineluctable that it shall return to its rightful placeand it is with out much ado that it does.such is its willfulness;such is the woe of the settling dust.will you leave me to my vacuityleave me to search my heartand let the wind carry away the dust.all together now...Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1112990425453154342005-04-09T03:49:00.000+08:002005-04-09T04:00:25.453+08:00how do i start anew?with so many tags nailed to my paper doll.it's time to pull out a few but the scars will always remain...Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1112544131618951392005-04-03T23:50:00.000+08:002005-04-04T00:04:41.933+08:00such a joy and yet a bane;a piece to reflect the moodrandom thoughts: through the looking glasshow delicate the mirror seemsadorned with the reflection of your face.now those sad eyes, please dont teari'll bring a flower and a songif only you could hearthese words i hold so dear.alas it is the mirror's baneits plebeian frame unbefitting to hold such a lovely face.oh! wont you pause just for Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1111646681237828482005-03-24T13:53:00.000+08:002005-03-24T14:53:44.033+08:00random thoughts: As the leaves fall ... When your heart allows a single speck of emotion to enter,the whole world will come flooding in along with it.My heart has been sealed shut for a long time. The apathyof this world and its mundaneness have kept it numb. Evennow as i move to become a more extroverted person that i ever have been, the apprehension sets in ever so often. The doors to my heart Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1110297818218985662005-03-09T00:03:00.000+08:002005-03-09T00:14:10.383+08:00God Put A Smile On My FaceWhy do I like to smile? Well, I don't. Many people just feel that way about me. They claimed that there is always a smile on my face. That is true in a way,however it doesnt necessarily mean that i enjoy smiling though. the malady that is social contact has ravaged my mind and solitute is my only solaceThe smile on my face is my talisman. It is a mask that conceals me Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1108836322645952382005-02-20T02:05:00.000+08:002005-02-20T02:18:23.096+08:00Solitude is an addiction;Social contact is a fucking disease.Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1107352973321237042005-02-02T22:01:00.000+08:002005-02-02T23:36:43.066+08:00in memory of rainy days... that will not let me go
now and then: rainy days
rain
wistful gobbets of memories
sojurned on the window panes.
rouse not when they convene
to conjure a retrospect
how distant my mind has wandered,
have i erred?
behind fogged up windows
could i abscond;
behind a resplendent clarity
my mind has wandered
whither do i tote this ardorJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1105895672616029312005-01-17T01:39:00.000+08:002005-01-17T01:21:44.656+08:00"And death shall have no dominion ..."
i came across a thought today... just like that
it made me ponder, what exactly do i want in life?
i was clueless.
aspirations, ambitions, hopes and dreams
what are they to me? "all they are is dust in the wind..."
been viewing several films over the past few weeks,
(no action slash adventure hollywood flicks mind you)
from them, i derived a certain Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1105117039197427872005-01-08T01:45:00.000+08:002005-01-08T12:40:47.823+08:00a sign of the times: ORD LOH ! (93 days to go)
not much new insights lately, but i did managed to get
this piece out.
a house in time
my heart i left in a wooden chest
as if is a case of need.
alas there are naught to illuminate
a barren wall in languid sight
the air's trembling with its decay
dreary cinders do not despair.
splinters's about;
i shall thread with care
a spell Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1104645368120656602005-01-02T13:54:00.000+08:002005-01-02T16:40:31.553+08:00random thoughts: Into dust; The wind in my face.
lives are gone, lives are changed for eternity
but others remained unchanged like mine.
a time of reflection maybe
but for whom and what i wonder
apathy is prevalent, but is it even wrong?
there's a dread in my heart
it fears death and sorrow
and keeps both at a distance.
it is cowardice i admit
they say bravery is not being without fear
but it Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1104051986374636212004-12-26T17:03:00.000+08:002004-12-26T17:06:45.966+08:00exactly one year ago i wrote this piece. i thought it to be
too cheesy like the previous post. but what the heck, here's
another one for Christmas. Im stoned.
Song of a Winter Scent
hush, i think we are alone now
or is that a song playing
suffice is a smile
on the face of reverie
to alight from the day bound train
a winter scent she's searching for
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1103806959584275152004-12-23T20:56:00.000+08:002004-12-24T00:17:16.166+08:00who says i cant write cheesy poems?
here's one for jolly old Christmas day...
beatitude
it's with much joy that i profess
this love for thee
on this festive day to make merry.
it's with you,
that each day is akin to a gift
a sense of gaiety or relief,
so unravel then with eagerness
and mind not come what may
for the winter wind shall sweep thy sorrows away.
it's with clandestine that St Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1102782231252629232004-12-12T13:22:00.000+08:002004-12-24T00:18:30.660+08:00a recollection of dawns & dusks: Two Years Of NS
the boatman wore a crooked smile
it's hazy now,
ferry me then to another life
oh how bitter sweet the evening scent
another, another has to be
ever lovely those still mornings
a year and another
the need, the need to leave.
so the boatman tilt his straw hat in mock salute
the haze begins to clear,
a journey almost done now.
2 years of life Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1100971096545285652004-11-21T01:03:00.000+08:002004-11-21T01:46:51.063+08:00random thoughts: a take on life
the walls are indifferent with their unnerving white
it's a overcast sky with a stream of light
cautiously through the panes it slips
an unfamiliar guest 'tween the walls
no sound came from the thief as it crept across the room
no sound came from the room; it kept watch
life is like a cookie jar, dont get your hand stuck in it.
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1100333015255868912004-11-13T15:37:00.000+08:002004-11-13T17:58:39.663+08:00random thoughts: sail away
the waves rise and fall,
there is a song amongst them.
carriers of hopes and dreams
how lofty these ships are
as they forged forlorn through the tempest.
alas my body resides in the eye
my mind's estranged from its vessal.
"drop the anchor be done and rest,"
the sirens enticed with such voices so soothing.
imagine, dream
what a wonder
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1099283575262719972004-11-01T13:31:00.000+08:002004-11-01T12:32:55.263+08:00Song For The Moment
Dust In The Wind
by Kansas
I close my eyes
Only for a moment
And the moment's gone
All my dreams
Pass before my eyes a curiosity
Dust in the wind
All they are is dust in the wind
Same old song
Just a drop of water
In an endless sea
All we do
Crumbles to the ground
Though we refuse to see
Dust in the wind
All we are is dust in the wind
Now, don't hang on
Nothing last Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1099149360925859472004-10-30T19:38:00.000+08:002004-10-30T23:16:00.926+08:00the rain is softly descending
from clouded skies with a hinge of grey.
everywhere is quiet;
less the enamoring dampness of the air.
there is nothing else.
emotionally numb,
a predominant state of my mind.
i wished it would rain forever
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1097336060477033162004-10-09T23:33:00.000+08:002004-10-09T23:34:20.476+08:00for me alone
by the panes it sings
a drone that reminisces envelop me in its wings
with a heart that burrows beneath burgeoning spring
what a tragedy it must be
not to hear the dance of myriad leaves and its wind
for me alone in my abode
but a taper to tend the sight
naught but with melancholy that i pine
a spring i left behind
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1096118013449630832004-09-25T21:12:00.000+08:002004-09-25T21:13:33.450+08:00all my dreams when i was young, where are they now?
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1094734293712800462004-09-09T20:43:00.000+08:002004-09-09T20:51:33.713+08:00vague, hasty and too raw...again
but it's been awhile
the day and the wind
the days are heartless with its touch
to beget both dawn and dusk
yet in the night it ensconces
amongst the slumbering a clandestine
now leave the night to spin its thread
sleep soundly and do not stir
lest to unnerve the moon that dwells in the lake
wont the cold wind blow tonight?
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1092068089912377842004-08-09T23:41:00.000+08:002004-08-11T21:35:11.433+08:00maybe it's too brief, but it tells the story...
the room in the sky
my lord! my lord could i leave?
leave me to glide through the air
wondrous it is to grasp a wind
as one that hurls against the skies
alas im in the corner
it will keep me safe
make haste to rejoice in mirth
for there's no gaiety in the sky
when none could fathom
who then do the rain weep for?
a child by the window peering Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1091627338558490572004-08-04T21:46:00.000+08:002004-08-04T21:51:56.286+08:00random thoughts: so it is ruled that im in the wrong
who's to right the wrong
who shall determine the rights and wrongs
how many will pause to consider
that they themselves might be at fault?
but yet there's neither
for the rights and wrongs are decided by perception
and perception is a fickle thing
as mentioned again and before
beyond rights and wrongs
beyond good and evil
i wish
but chaos Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1090126615475130052004-07-18T12:56:00.000+08:002004-07-18T13:01:54.170+08:00the ebb of hours
dates and days not unlike pebbles
a bargain it seems of a wish for each
to mock the hours once too many
foreordained as it is of day
to live its passing
not unlike lilies by placid stream
alas i found myself perched by its bank
to watch as pebbles skip across the waters
to ponder over wishes for each
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1089522699439800072004-07-11T13:10:00.000+08:002004-07-11T13:47:49.173+08:00the weekend in brief
fourty years in london
and im stoned on the bus
a distant cacophony begins to drone
to tote my body along
to wade itself through downing skies
but alas discontinued itself in still
fourty years in london
and im stoned on the bus
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1089035045784933742004-07-05T20:49:00.000+08:002004-07-07T23:51:02.616+08:00evolvement?
digital tryst
it is with digital ink i write
of eulogies for dead poets
that bore the form; wired frames
with joints queer and hollow
so it is when glitter wanes
a conjure; as metals in embrace
leaves soldered words
alas rust is cold to the touch
just a new ingredient; a tinge of heart
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1088865204077792902004-07-03T20:58:00.000+08:002004-07-03T23:28:37.560+08:00a barrage of silence;
thank god for the rain
the when...
stayed at home this weekend.
considering i also had the day off yesterday made this
the longest time spent at home for quite awhile.
the what...
thus i drifted into monotony and my mind blanked
out for two whole days. which is apparently the dominant
activity that i partake in if hours spent at home is >20 hrs.
well, it's a rought Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1088174968893056552004-06-25T22:04:00.000+08:002004-06-25T23:07:01.686+08:00the skies of mars are red
what then now of this piece?
on the meadow lived the azure
on the meadow lived the azure
and so it adorn the boy with such
a ragged cloak of time, wingless in flight
alas the wind that brings to task
oh! what wind that totes these sour sweet
short of him to ask
a fleeting haste for a flower in sight
wither does he meander Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1087663401013516552004-06-20T00:40:00.000+08:002004-06-20T12:32:37.443+08:00on the meadow lived the azure (Part One)
on the meadow lived the azure
and so it adorn the boy with such;
a ragged cloak of time, wingless in flight.
alas the wind that brings to task
oh! what wind that totes these sour sweet
short of him to ask
damn, i have trouble continuing it
mind's a blank nowadays it seems...
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1087093755825333352004-06-13T10:26:00.000+08:002004-06-13T10:32:39.176+08:00short summary of life till now: one more year to ORD!
random thoughts: an illusion of choices
inside our hearts lie our desires
deeper still, and you'll find prejudices
but what guises we allow them to don
to veil the truth from our hearts
very few hold a conscience brave enough to own up to it
as they hold on to these 'truth' all so dearly
causing such annoyance to the people around
yet Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1086149657185669042004-06-02T12:10:00.000+08:002004-06-02T12:21:40.470+08:00almost one full year, how far have i come?
repost :
A Dream Of Stars
what of the moon blind to my sleep
stay awhile, wont you please?
and set my dreams a sail
amongst the habour of stars in my wake.
a lark it is; ever faithful
a ship there was; truly missed
"dont shed a tear now
i promise i'll wait"
what of stars blind to its passing
as twilight skies sings its lullaby
i will find you again
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1085243528743576172004-05-23T00:31:00.000+08:002004-06-09T21:42:53.236+08:00such a contemplation...
flower on the precipice
buildings disheartened, trow in the dismal
as fleeting steps nears its breath
my paltry flowers on the precipice
light up so a dimly lit
dingy walls with untimely clarity
for cinders wilt daintily into the starless
when then will it turn into darkness
now to whom shall i beseech
before the unstirred make to connive
should i ?
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1084646156201634822004-05-16T02:30:00.001+08:002004-05-16T02:36:32.080+08:00special, abnormal or just plain loser?
i dont want to be a sell-out
but lord it's hard to keep the faith...
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1084552415454541722004-05-14T23:32:00.000+08:002004-05-16T02:13:44.873+08:00far, far away in the south china sea ya
sometimes, on the the way to finding your dreams,
you get lost and find a better one.
had been on EX on a naval ship. it wasn't that exciting or
anything but nonetheless it was a rare experience and at least
we got to set sail. i found myself slightly enthralled by the
endless blue at the edge of the world where you could barely
begin to fathom that Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1082989116944600432004-04-26T22:11:00.000+08:002004-04-29T20:19:54.623+08:00it's raw; maybe i was too hasty
streets with no names
is there a song for the homeless
without, the flock might depart
the streets are cold with its unkindly coat
regard then with discreetness
lest to soil that which is shy of blemishes
for the moon does not side
stay close now to the walls
albeit the relief in the placidity
yearn yet the whiff of day
the fathomless night will not sway
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1082864111538283142004-04-25T10:53:00.000+08:002004-05-15T01:03:55.586+08:00an affinity for war drama and a disdain for NS: a connection? - HELL NO !
finally got to view a particular film in its entirety on cable recently, and was a little surprised when
i found out that it was The Pianist. i have always thought that it was one of those happy-go-lucky
hollywood flicks but i guess i was wrong. there are many so called arty films out there which
i probably would have Jacknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1082223719131172702004-04-18T00:51:00.000+08:002004-04-18T01:47:10.140+08:00random thoughts found in camp
typing an entry in camp seem somewhat strange to me at this
point of time. but i love the feeling of detachment and peace
that only this kind of environment can provide; a world so alien
under the cover of velvet. i hate to be alone in a crowd, but
adore i do the solitude when im by myself, especially in the night.
i think i know the reason why, but it's more aptJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1081654759167513052004-04-11T11:08:00.001+08:002004-04-11T14:19:40.013+08:00i hold my knive in still
to cut the dullness in the air
for it speaks with a heavy heart
im lost... lost for words, lost in a world alien to me. mornings appear so distant and foreign
since i enlisted in the saf. on most sunday mornings, i would unwittingly sleep through them
but not today i guess. listening to music from lionel richie, duran duran, crowded house and
the sort somehow kindaJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1080376897717653122004-03-27T15:49:00.000+08:002004-04-04T01:22:46.186+08:00just another in a sea of dreamers
dreamers are a dime too many but i guess the world makes us this way.
i may be depressed and full of regrets but there are too many self-pitying
dreamers out there. it's beginning to disgust me. i admit there is a thin line
between regret and self-pity but why waste life brooding over such things.
maybe it's easier on me since for myself, it has always been Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1079185459354185872004-03-13T21:43:00.000+08:002004-03-29T22:18:56.936+08:00the half way mark ...
im writing this one week from the date, but what the heck.
it's half a life time, but it feels like forever. one year and three months since
i boarded that bus at pasir ris interchange to ferry me to another life. i have
learn much and would like to think that i have somewhat matured at least
abit. but i seriously doubt so. damn, feel too empty and shagged to write
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1078567767182048832004-03-06T18:09:00.000+08:002004-03-06T18:30:31.186+08:00fleeting glimpses of muse are all i received
but contentment is another thing
a proclamation: i dont care how high the garmen is
going to raise the price of fags. what happen to freedom of choice
anyway? aint alcohol worse? it gets you wasted for that few minutes
of high. fags just help makes you feel good and think better.
it's true, non believers! anyway... i have this attachment to my
70 Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1077992734965610242004-02-29T02:25:00.000+08:002004-02-29T02:50:27.296+08:00now, this is scary. wahaha
Your wings are DRAGON wings. Massive andcovered in scales, they shimmer with strengthand magic. They are the most obvious display ofyour power - though it runs equally throughoutyour heart and mind. You are uncompromising andgrave, with a profound sense of justice. Youhave firm ideas about what is right and what iswrong and set out to fix what problems you can.You Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1077886811123165642004-02-27T21:00:00.000+08:002004-02-29T03:34:08.610+08:00it's been awhile
a flower cased in snow
flower in winter
soon to wither
a life in stone
to see it in bloom
whither do we bemoan?
sleep well april showers,
if ever in winter december
the snow's beauty veiled by cold.
do not mind the unmoving white
tip it over, let it fall once more
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1076502553953659322004-02-11T20:29:00.000+08:002004-02-11T21:34:26.513+08:00i do love the army camps way up north. im currently on course
in one of them, which means waking up an hour later than usual,
prata for breakfast and early book outs. all these while playing
free cell and solitaire in between. not to forget, the chance to
take those long bus trips i relish so much.the bunch of us were
thinking, why cant we do this for the rest of our ns life? sigh. nearly
two Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1076081465722432442004-02-06T23:31:00.000+08:002004-02-11T21:10:40.186+08:00a responsibility to life; damn, i hate that so much
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1075701382479754772004-02-02T13:56:00.000+08:002004-02-02T16:12:18.123+08:00i'm a man of few words lately, so here's another
blue skies bring rain
would you miss the sun
empty bus stop on rainy days
the clarity's misplaced
then you're on your own
do not regard, my sad eyes
for the thunder's dying
to rue in anguish now
would you peer through the rain veil
to find a love clandestine
going tick then a drip
with dinky delight
fleecy rain kisses shallJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1075040379311387432004-01-25T22:19:00.000+08:002004-01-25T22:25:11.996+08:00A Woe Of Words
only the street lamps stand now
could you spare me a light?
alas ive deceived myself
and paint the night sky blue
alas the dimness in the pen
to imprecate myself with deceit
of the banal that clothe itself with panache
artless though may be
least without a taint; i attest
only the street lamps stand now
could you spare me a light?
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1074166535618470012004-01-15T19:35:00.000+08:002004-01-19T21:19:11.403+08:00reaching out for something
finding out what im reaching out for
Sipping On Star Dew
set in motion
a gallery of stars
to lit the sky a wondrous life
make a wish; woeful one
to stumble from the heavens
with a burden to tote
her eyes' perched on the starry night
gaze not please my child
the softness of the earth from afar
sweep the dust off the grass
and baskJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1073572798518487082004-01-08T22:39:00.000+08:002004-01-10T23:00:13.123+08:00metade fumaca
lighted incense
soft odor of clarity
beyond masquerade
'tis beyond me
a mirage of reverie
breathe in renewal
for my hands' on heaven
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1072187078690494682003-12-23T21:44:00.000+08:002003-12-25T13:53:22.543+08:00Leaving Autumn
sadly now,
she stood with trepidation
allow me the crisp autumn air
with lithe leaves in its dance
allow me the soft autumn wind
weaving its dance amongst my hair
refuse me not please
a sweet send off to winter's cold
sadly now,
she stood with trepidation
let the earth don a smile in my place
wave my goodbyes for me
hark to the windJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1071580525772494382003-12-16T21:15:00.000+08:002003-12-16T21:18:47.250+08:00Song For The Moment :
Angel - Aerosmith
I'm alone yeah I don't know if I can face the night
I'm in tears and the cryin that I do is for you
I want your love let's break the wall between us
Don't make it tough, I'll put away my pride
Enough's enough, I've suffered and I've seen the light
You're my angel come and save me tonight
You're my angel come and make it alright
You're my angel come andJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1071315519596634882003-12-13T19:38:00.000+08:002003-12-14T16:38:11.123+08:00one year soldier
one year has passed since my induction into this
evolution into "manhood". and how do i celebrate
it ? by doing duty in camp. i'm typing this in the middle
of nowhere, in a small room in an empty camp. this is
somewhat the first time im performing duty in this camp.
maybe it's symbolic in a way, but then again, it aint
raining. no mood to type anything much now,
will Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1070789982320789152003-12-07T17:39:00.000+08:002003-12-12T20:42:19.280+08:00Crystal Baller
the spite of all,
i knelt down in hope
do not snatch this please
my child
who would bare?
her chastity.
who would, but then
hold to regard
the world i tuck away in crystal ball.
shrouded in velvet
peer not; i attest
like eagerness bore away
my child
you would be mine no more
abscond in the world you entreat
i would find you no more.
queerness aside
you need not stand
the spite ofJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1069517601805778222003-11-23T00:13:00.000+08:002003-12-07T17:45:08.030+08:00the man among empty pews
sing alone
buildings around my providence
the raindrops fall
a lick, a kiss will suffice
the solid ground shall stand
sing alone
praise he who exhorts my providence
atone for my chapel
hear my call
a craft of bells rendering
of tears tending the silence
sing alone
a sober canticle of my providence
the man among empty pews
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1068992947825118082003-11-16T22:29:00.000+08:002003-11-16T22:32:20.356+08:00Song For The Moment :
I'd love you to want me - Lobo
When I saw you standing there
I about fell off my chair
When you moved your mouth to speak
I felt the blood go to my feet
Now it took time for me to know
What you tried so not to show
Something in my soul just cried
I see the want in your blue eyes
Baby, I'd love you to want me
The way that I want you
The way that it should be
Baby, you'dJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1068903712151729962003-11-15T21:41:00.000+08:002003-11-15T22:02:49.623+08:00grieving crow of sorrow - a sequel
a murmur, it beckons
i'll sleep no more
when the grieving crow takes flight.
of sorrow; faint spirit of thy
the sweetest dew it covets
a curse to the shadowless,
truly i
gently now, the cold depart
the song carried by the crow
lures the faintest of heart.
wish night goodbye
take flight now
who then to Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1068731233202294872003-11-13T21:47:00.000+08:002003-11-13T22:18:07.686+08:00days when i could just lie down
by the green and dream.
i have fallen too far behind. i'm becoming abnormal.
cheonging, partying, pubbing. activities i indulge in
for a brief period of time. but i got totally sick of
it pretty fast. now, when my friends go out and cheong, what
am i to do? join them and bore myself; or turn down
the offer and become a partial outcast. it's much harder,
almostJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1067531908856628422003-10-31T00:38:00.000+08:002003-10-31T00:41:18.513+08:00the painter
and i'm the painter
with a palette of colours
to paint a dream
with a paltette of dreams
to paint my life
i have but shades of grey
to paint a sky
with a tinge of pain
of poignancy the painter has
to begin
for the bluest skies beckon so
"contemplate the sweetness,"
when burgeoning wind bellows
tis alike; a bland of life
unbefitting but who's to fathom
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1067430134738629572003-10-29T20:22:00.000+08:002003-10-29T20:23:56.236+08:00Listening To :
2 + 2 = 5 by Radiohead
Are you such a dreamer
To put the world to rights
I'll stay home forever
Where two and two always makes a five
I'll lay down the tracks
Sandbag and hide
January has April showers
And two and two always makes a five
It's the devil's way now
There is no way out
You can scream and you can shout
It is too late now
Because you're not there
Payin' Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1067002054602134142003-10-24T21:27:00.000+08:002003-10-24T21:43:45.800+08:00random words :
i want to get to the other side
maybe it pleases me more
you know the words dont mean much
but it doesnt matter at all
why now, why then
regrets and forgiveness; my sin
heed not the bluest skies
for it leads you to a tale and high
imagine with sigh
am i the passing time
am i the prentender
why
so you feel it's a crime
so you feel it's a care of my mind
why
the grace of death
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1066937072666232162003-10-24T03:24:00.000+08:002003-10-24T03:25:40.900+08:00rantings of a sleepy whiner
who cant sleep
bright lights in town
people, faces ; sweet eyes
and always the now
a smoke, a smoke
a life
with love, with sigh
those nights to die
that's the piece
there's no fancy words
if there's a sneer
then i've in reply
"ka ni na bei chao chee bai"
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1066744016116200582003-10-21T21:46:00.000+08:002003-10-22T20:01:45.520+08:00gather no moss
with the peeling of a wind
"too long! too long!"
the stone told the clouds
for it to seek once more
"too low! too low!"
the rain fling its words
at sea the wind howls with contempt
there the ship lays a cradling mock
but stare not at the sky for long
of it and plebeian ground
an allurement that arises not
the unanchored stone leaves not a dint
but soft sandy greys of memories
"Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1066500589196027902003-10-19T02:09:00.000+08:002003-10-21T21:59:45.720+08:00"when the dreary wind blows
bring me back please
it's too hard to dream"
Many A Whinings:
Something You Should Read And Then
Forget About What You Just Read
Warning : Might Be Deemed Insensitive,
High-handed And Extremely Offensive To
Certain Groups Of People
(p.s. as i read this days later, i realized i might
have been feeling abit too high for my own good.
but heck, i'm not going to Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1066304366683911642003-10-16T19:39:00.000+08:002003-10-16T20:57:54.956+08:00surrogate
a sad countenance upon the opal sky
the light's farewell to the green
as grey ashes tend the evening field
boundless the wind that carries
another flower yet to weep for.
tell me
can they forgive the wind when it blows?
tell me
where do i go to fall from grace?
lest i leave before a taste.
the stoic and flower never shall intertwine
cause wont the realJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1065621776171598732003-10-08T22:02:00.000+08:002003-10-09T21:30:23.890+08:00maybe if i add in some jokes
and corny life stories on this blog
then it will have more hits?
.... nah.
"smoking harms your family"
hmm. something to ponder about
when i ord.
p.s. fuck all those chimneys.Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1065613619595037912003-10-08T19:46:00.000+08:002003-10-08T19:48:23.536+08:00"wont the real world cry when the dreamers wake
can they forgive the wind when it weeps?"
I wont.
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1065291779824146322003-10-05T02:22:00.000+08:002003-10-05T02:22:59.620+08:00yellow box
im drifting back
smoke in my eyes
tomorrow
that's my mind
come
i found another
a flick of light
forward
that's my mind
live
i say for later
again with why
sky
that's my mind
that's my mind
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1064929642188496972003-09-30T21:47:00.000+08:002003-09-30T21:47:34.576+08:00Coffee & Tea
i sipped the coffee
with love, with sigh
no sweet without the bitter
underneath vanilla sky
i taste the bitter
therefore i know the sweet
but what is bitter?
if i know not the sweet
and with such i rather sipped
if they ever ask
a simple cup of tea
- inspired by a movie; it's obvious.
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1064841964536309212003-09-29T21:26:00.000+08:002003-09-29T21:26:28.970+08:00Regret : Apathy Of My Youth
have i lost out in life because of my prevailing apathy?
i did not cared much about anything when i was in school
and even less now while serving ns.
im beginning to feel the consequences
it has always been there but it's finally sinking in.
so much that i could have done.
so much that i could have done for my future.
i was actually living the high life once.
andJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1064727805050845342003-09-28T13:43:00.000+08:002003-09-28T13:43:24.776+08:00A Dream Of Stars
what of the moon blind to my sleep
stay awhile, wont you please?
and set my dreams a sail
amongst the habour of stars in my wake.
a lark it is; ever faithful
a ship there was; truly missed
"dont shed a tear now
i promise i'll wait"
what of stars blind to its passing
as twilight skies sings its lullaby
i will find you again
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1064076537845325472003-09-21T00:48:00.000+08:002003-09-21T00:48:57.320+08:00A Dream Of Stars (Part II)
what of stars blind to its passing
as twilight skies sings its lullaby
i will find you again
amongst comfortless nights.
decry the moon that entwine the hearts
a forlorn soul needs not but a silent prayer
"to sleep a dream
with stars to guide"
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1063990977184892122003-09-19T10:02:00.000+08:002003-09-20T01:04:46.316+08:00A Dream Of Stars (Part I)
what of the moon that is blind to my sleep
stay awhile, wont you please?
and set my dreams a sail
amongst the habour of stars in my wake.
a lark it is; ever faithful
a ship there was; truly missed
"dont shed a tear now
i promise i'll wait"
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1063627578461201002003-09-15T20:06:00.000+08:002003-09-15T20:31:08.390+08:00Friday, 120903
slipping; a life gone away
again he lays down a flower,
crying a tinge of grey
the night of another friday.
"god did not save him"
in memory and silent farewell
a life i once knew.
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1062684104088461022003-09-04T22:01:00.000+08:002003-09-04T22:01:44.120+08:00ok, i finally got it done.
wanted to make it abit longer
but i confess, i got bored.
Friday, 290803
the young boy flees, with contrive
time and again, he returns in kind
a benign spirit, endowed with a smile
a journey almost done now
alas the evening sun,
living through the glass
all the town that flew past
alas the cold turning warm
with a sigh and another
all the dream worlds he rather
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1062508305612943542003-09-02T21:11:00.000+08:002003-09-02T21:12:10.156+08:00something is seriously pissing me off ...
but what the hell fuck izzit ??!!!
feel damn fucking dulan today!
god save the me !
wohoo !
Listening To :
Blind - Korn
This place inside my mind, a place I like to hide.
You don't know the chances. What if I should die?
A place inside my brain, another kind of pain.
You don't know the chances. I'm so blind!
Another means I find, to escape the Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1062419769276924122003-09-01T20:36:00.000+08:002003-09-01T20:40:47.603+08:00just some crap. wohoo!
does real love exist?
love is just a feeling
it's a manifestation like anger, sadness and joy
and all these feelings can actually be influenced
or controlled by perception
so what is real love then?
a little something to think about... wohoo!
- my two cents worth of crapping after reading
some hilarious comments by certain sporeans in
a forum... on the subject of love, Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1062168652830155822003-08-29T22:50:00.000+08:002003-08-29T22:52:45.090+08:00my mind is feeling kinda blank nowadays
going to try something different ...
... presenting part I of the story of this
fateful day...
Friday, 290803 (Part I)
the young boy flees, with contrive
time and again, he returns in kind
a benign spirit, endowed with a smile
a journey almost done now
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1061555101443540942003-08-22T20:25:00.000+08:002003-08-22T20:25:24.670+08:00don't feel like writing anything...
so here's one of my favourite movie quotes from
"Can't Hardly Wait"
Angel to Preston: "There is fate, but it only takes you so far,
because once you're there its up to you to make it happen. "
Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1060965294455861432003-08-16T00:34:00.000+08:002003-09-26T22:30:57.863+08:00then again the summer breeze
and then again, the summer breeze
a song lost among the leaves
with love, a pang
such sweetness still
a blue bird sings
by the hemlock tree
though for shadows
longing for thee
there i sat, on a well-worn path
there i await, without a care
with weather so fair
and then again, the summer breeze
a song lost among the leavesJacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1060699304100408602003-08-12T22:41:00.000+08:002003-08-12T22:49:35.060+08:00Listening To :
The Other Side - David Gray
Meet me on the other side
Meet me on the other side
I'll see you on the other side
See you on the other side
Honey now if I'm honest
I still don't know what love is
Another mirage folds into the haze of time recalled
And now the floodgates cannot hold
All my sorrow all my rage
A teardrop falls on every page
Meet me on the other side
Meet me on the Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1060689241260760022003-08-12T19:54:00.000+08:002003-09-01T20:45:35.540+08:00random thoughts from a science student
& a few curses too
been wondering through the blogs today,
reading random thoughts and the lifes of the more socially apt ?
the arts students: a different species unlike the science mutants?
and we are not even talking abt jc versus poly versus ite and so on.
as i went through their writings, it was what i always thought but
today was just a verification: Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1060535000535447202003-08-11T01:03:00.000+08:002003-09-11T21:42:18.913+08:00for the first time in weeks, i actually do not know what to write... haha
initially, i wanted to whine abt yet another case of incompetency
in the army which angered me to a huge extent, but forget it
i cant seem to hold a grudge for long anyway...
therefore, i present yet another of my attempts at decent poetry.
Enjoy ! wahaha
" would it be me, "
skies of the down,
who are you now?
my Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1059854088403948402003-08-03T03:54:00.000+08:002003-08-12T20:02:13.440+08:00Beauty hides in thy heart,
Its sight the mind's regard.
lately a number of my friends had been commenting, along the
lines of "wah, now all the girls in orchard seem so chio.."
they later attribute it to the prolonged time they spend in camp,
being able to book out only during the weekends. ergo are
deprived of "scenaries". its something i dont seem to experience,
maybe coz i book out Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1059852189831751782003-08-03T03:23:00.000+08:002003-08-03T03:23:09.820+08:00A Brief Encounter & Another Part II
I've been meeting so many old friends recently that it's beginning to frighten me.
well, maybe a little. Today or rather, yesterday evening a group of us were
walking into hmv when we met an ex-classmate of mine in sec 3/4, who also
happens to be an ex-classmate of a friend in my group, in jc.haha. now that
wasn't the end of the story, just while we were Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1059658429410025282003-07-31T21:33:00.000+08:002003-07-31T21:33:49.563+08:00Listening To :
(haha, now who doesn't remember this song? )
Johnny B. Goode - Chuck Berry
Deep down Louisiana close to New Orleans,
Way back up in the woods among the evergreens
There stood a log cabin made of earth and wood,
Where lived a country boy named of Johnny B. Goode
Who never ever learned to read or write so well,
But he could play the guitar like ringing a bell.
(Chorus)
Go Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1059305439414522222003-07-27T19:30:00.000+08:002003-07-27T19:40:19.543+08:00here i am writing again in the matter of days,
maybe i have too much free time on my hands?
the marvels of youth, and once again i heave a sigh...
the never ending zeal
the impetuosity
the whole "fark you, i'm right" attitute
the wasted years
the dreams
the void
what are they to me?
i'm burning out even before i start
maybe i tried to too early,
a young immature fool thinking he knows the Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1059232870287722262003-07-26T23:21:00.000+08:002003-08-05T00:46:52.026+08:00Conversation With A Taxi Driver
It's one of those times again. that of regression and self evalulation,
something i detest but yet help pushes you ahead to another level of
maturity. *sighs* if only i could change...
while serving yet another ns obligation, an encounter suddenly
brought back a certain reminder; a reminder of how shallow i still am.
i know that i'm shallow. to know that is a Jacknoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5478973.post-1059055386551849242003-07-24T22:03:00.000+08:002003-07-27T18:58:19.670+08:00A Brief Encounter & Another :
By a twist of fate on my way home tonight, i met 2 friends i lost contact with; on
2 different buses. hah! cliche it may sound, but to quote an old saying,
" it never rains but it pours," it may not be unusual to bump into friends on the
streets, but to meet 2 within the span of one hour and further more on the
2 separate buses i take home daily.. well, what Jacknoreply@blogger.com0