a barrage of silence;
thank god for the rain


the when...
stayed at home this weekend.
considering i also had the day off yesterday made this
the longest time spent at home for quite awhile.


the what...
thus i drifted into monotony and my mind blanked
out for two whole days. which is apparently the dominant
activity that i partake in if hours spent at home is >20 hrs.
well, it's a rought estimate. if you happen to be one of
those who wondered why i fagged(though the chances of those
concerned knowing the existence of this blog is minute),
this is one of them. it's more of breaking out of it but what
the heck, doesn't it sound better if i phrased it this way.


the why...
why do i not engage in hobbies/sports or pursue more rewarding
activities then? this excludes the usual social activities by
the way. the most compelling reason is laziness, but that's just
too easy. i suspect it's more of this innate nature to slip into
depression ever too often. but that would be too convenient an excuse.


the who...
so who is to judge this good for nothing slacker cum idler
attitude of mine? i know a number of people would. those self-
righteous persons with their naive idealistic views with regard to
themselves and the actions of others. it is in their opinion
that i had been conceited and full of myself with these words. and
i apologised for i too am guilty of this self-righteous 'hero'
behaviour. crafted out of this need for one.


all apologies. for i had digressed once more.
nevertheless the crux is this:


all i need is a smoke.

{-+-}